A lot of the time when I write, speak, or preach, I feel that I’m being misheard or misunderstood.
Most weeks that I put out this newsletter, I get one or two private messages pushing back on something I said.
Much of the time, these pushbacks have little or nothing to do with the point I was trying to make.
But people hear what they hear, and sometimes they hear things that I didn’t mean or intend.
I was on sabbatical for the past month, and I pre-wrote all of my substack posts in June.
During July I deleted my email and messenger apps and ignored all phone calls.
Looking at my messages this week, I had a pretty large number of critical comments about some of my posts from July.
And that’s fine. I’m grateful. I’m so glad people are reading.
But the thing is, I have a thin skin, and I worry about the things people think about me.
It bothers me when I feel misunderstood.
I constantly want to defend my writing and my speaking.
I want people to like and approve of the things that I say, even though I say some divisive or upsetting things sometimes.
John Green has often said that the most important interpretation of his writing is what the reader pulls from it, not what he originally intended.
In his words, “books belong to their readers.”
“What I eventually realized is that the real business of books is not done by awards committees or people who turn trees into paper or editors or agents or even writers. We’re all just facilitators. The real business is done by readers.”1
I’ve spent the past eight and a half years concerned with how I’m being heard and interpreted.
But the truth is, I’m throwing into the universe my own thoughts and perspective.
Other people see these experiences and issues entirely differently.
And the way they - the way you - view my writing matters considerably more than what I originally intended.
I guess all I’m trying to say here is, thank you for reading and engaging.
I’ve been cranking out these posts for almost a year now.
It’s bonkers to me how much people like you care about the things I have to say.
So thank you.
Thank you for pushing back.
Thank you for the conversation.
I genuinely appreciate it.
This substack is, and will always be, free.
I have zero plans to ever put anything I write here behind a paywall.
But if you want to financially support my writing, you’re welcome to do that.
Supporting me won’t get you anything tangible.
But you’ll make me smile.
And you’ll probably incentivize me to keep writing.
https://www.mentalfloss.com/article/54511/14-quotes-about-writing-john-green
I also worry & fret of what people think of me of what I do & what I say! I struggle with this daily! Thank you for sharing this. It helps that I am not the only one!
💜💜💜💜💜💜